Hello again my Afiey’sta…It has been awhile I have not been posting in my dear AF Words. How I missed a lot of fortunate and unfortunate events, which I always wanted to share it in here but it always ended up just a plan.
Anyway, here I am again, almost a year after my last post…I am back with what I really need the most right now…H O P E
…“Life goes on and never lose HOPE”…
The quote that keeps lingering in my mind…replayed and replaying, never ceasing. This quote too, keeps me going and believes every challenge in life, there is opportunity in disguise. It might sound a little bit melancholic though but yeah, bad things happened in life and it will never stop…and this also relates to few events occurred to me lately and to this post too, so let’s switch all struggles today to strengths tomorrow.
Today 8th March, 2015 marks the International Women’s Day, an annual event that celebrates women’s accomplishments and promotes global gender equality and this is my take…Women today are amazing, stronger, tougher in their own demeanour…they are changing the world for a better tomorrow. Captivating the power of this special day, somehow I feel content, overwhelmed with mix feelings and choose to be inspired and at the same time…inspiring…!
So, the HOPE chronology started on the tenth of the ten…10th October, 2014. The date that been chosen for the caesarean procedure to welcome my second child, my new bundle of joy, baby Arieqah Ariannna. She is so special to us as she came to our life 12 years after our first and 2 years after my post Brain Tumour surgery catastrophe.
My 2 months confinement period started well at the beginning but ended up tragically. I suffered with chronic coughing, sweating at night and swelling around my neck just above my collar bone. I thought it was just a post natal effects due to hormonals change or something like that but when breathing difficulty and sleeping disorder (sleeping only in a seating position, not on my back) grieved me for almost more than a month then only I realized that is not normal. I went to see my ObGyn to seek for advice and she suggested I go for a blood test and a thyroid ultrasound test. I did the test and the result of my neck swelling was not because of my thyroid but my lymph nodes and I was asked to stop breastfeeding my baby and continue to see ENT – Otorhinolaryngology specialist for further check-up.
With a heavy heart I stopped breastfeed baby Arie and started on formula. It was sad. I had such a difficult moment and a hard time to be detached from her…to see her on someone else arm, crying while sucking the formula milk from a silicon nipple of the feeding bottle with her both tearing eyes looking at me….only GOD knows how devastated I felt. My heart shattered and I burst into tears while expressing my milk with battery operated breast pump device. Plus with all sickness…chronic coughing, breathing difficulty, sleeping disorder, neck swelling and now engorged breasts…I gather all my energy and strength to look for remedies and treatments to be better and back to a normal me. I have to sacrifice and suspend all my design works and contract services until I know what is wrong with me.
After months of tests and numerous inconclusive results, 5 hours biopsy operation and a slight post Op scare at the edge of 2014 year end…Finally my tricky biopsy operation was a success and diagnosed with stage II Classical Hodgkin Lymphoma Cancer, which is NOT the most comforting news to start the New Year with. Anyway after 2 weeks stayed in hospital with 1 week on high dosage of Dexamethasone, endured Pleural Tapping, Bone Marrow test, received my 1st out of 12th from 6 cycles ABVD Chemotherapy session on my road to recovery…Praise to Almighty GOD, to finally earn disclosure is an indescribable feeling.
But looking back, ending 2014 with the knowledge that I have (mostly) taken the right steps for the family and baby Arie fills me with so much strength…and maybe, just maybe a step forward for me to become that Wonder-Woman they already see me in their eyes and Hey Lymphoma C…You have picked da wrong Diva. I am more powerful than you know and you fear the day I discover you… I will overcome, I will fight and I will make sure you are crushed…!
It is official that I am the resurrection from a Lady Meningioma Survivor to a Lady Lymphoma Soldier …and I believe…GOD gives HIS hardest Battles to HIS strongest Soldiers !
This may came a bit late though, but bring it on 2015 !